Happy Afrika Day....

AFRIKA DAY As many people celebrate Africa Day around the continent, I ask myself….What is there to celebrate? Do any of us really believe that Africa is free? 

None of our countries are under colonial rule, but we are clearly still as oppressed now as we were 50 years ago. So, I celebrate with a heavy heart.Self-ruled Africa has been riddled with corruption, power hungry despots and corruption of biblical proportions. And dictators who hold on to power and insist that it will only be snatched out of their cold dead hands. 

Civil war has gripped so many African countries in our life time, that I have lost count. So many countries that have achieved independence have only achieved political and never financial independence. The continent that has the most natural resources in the world also happens to be the poorest in the world. Only the leaders and their cronies have ever really had any kind of real wealth.Somalia, Sudan, Burundi, Libya, Angola, Ethiopia, Algeria, Chad, Mali, Morocco, Niger, Tunisia, DRC and even Nigeria. 

They have all had some kind of civil war in the last 10 years. And if you go further back into time, you will find many more examples. Corruption and a culture of even the law being a law unto itself is the norm right across Africa. When I went on holiday in Mozambique, I was warned to keep a few Meticals aside at all times for paying bribes. The police there are known to stop you at the drop of the hat for no reason at all except to get a bribe because you are a tourist. You could try argue with them, but 1. I speak no Portuguese at all and 2. I really don’t fancy spending a night in a Portuguese jail, just so I can go prove my innocence the next morning. That would be a very hollow victory. I am sad to say, South African Police have also caught on to this trend. They once told me point blank; “You may be right, but that means nothing right now. We will put you in jail for the night, impound your car and just withdraw the case on Monday morning (this was on a Saturday) when you appear in court.” So…do I want to be right and have my rectum violated in jail, or admit guilt on the spot and hand over R50? In the bigger scheme of things……we would all do the same thing, I am sure.  

Granted, Europe does not come out scot free in this. Think of Greece and Italy with their domestic issues right now. Neither does Asia, nor Central and South America. But that is THEIR problem, I am talking about MY domestic problems.

Now….let us focus on South Africa. One of the newest democracies in the world. Lauded as having had the most peaceful transitions of power from oppressor to oppressed of all time. The most peaceful “revolution” that anybody has ever seen. The oppressor literally just woke up one morning and decided to stop being a dick….South Africa is also hailed as having one of the most progressive constitutions and certainly the most democratic constitution. We were certainly on the right track. It seemed as if we were about to become a shining star on the African continent. An example of how this thing should be done. But then it started to go horribly wrong.

First of all, for the ANC to come into party, they had to promise us a “Better Life For All”. They promised all the things that we had been denied in the past. And they painted a rosy picture of free housing, water and electricity in the furthest corner of our country….and the ANC were going to make this happen. They didn’t say HOW they planned to achieve this. Nor did the masses care. Interestingly….education and jobs were not really high on their list of promises. I guess it was far less attractive to promise everybody a house than to promise them a JOB which will allow them to buy or build their own houses.

As I said before, South Africa was and still is, the great shining hope in Africa. The land of the free, if I may. So, needless to say, the influx of foreigners from the rest of the continent was inevitable. And they brought with them one thing that we don’t have here; A culture of hard work. They have it REALLY hard where they come from. They know what suffering is. So, they just want to catch a break. This is why they are so hated in the township. If a Somali opens a shop in your block, you best believe he will put you out of business. He will open earlier than you, close later than you, never run out of stock of anything. So as a result, when somebody wants to buy something in the township, they have the highest chance of getting it from the Somalis.

If I need my cell phone or laptop repaired, I know exactly where to go. Little Africa. It is there in every corner of this country now. Very highly skilled guys who do their job well and are CHEAP.I have LOADS of respect for our Nigerian and Somali brothers. They are the epitome of true entrepreneurship. We can all learn a thing or two about skills development (Nigerians) and a true work ethic (both). Their customer service, as with all of Africa, really, could use a LOT of help….but that is another story altogether.

So…..what do South Africans choose to do instead? Xenophobic attacks! March! Strike! Oh, we are GOOD at striking! If striking was a career, so many South Africans would be multi-millionaires from it. That is our solution to everything. STRIKE! March! Unrest here and there. Vavi For President! And we LOVE being in the mix of things. Even when we have no clue what the strike is about.

Yesterday, there was a huge strike in Kwa-Thema, near Springs. Apparently the cause of the unrest was electricity. As far as I could gather, they want to be converted from their current service provider to Eskom. But the thing that REALLY got their backs up was the announcement that they would no longer be receiving the R100 free electricity that each household was getting every month. So they took to the streets. Roads were barricaded, people were not allowed to go to work, so, effectively, the township was brought to a standstill. When I drove into the township last night, electricity had been restored (meaning that the impasse had somehow been resolved). But the place looked like a war zone. The streets were littered with debris, there were rocks everywhere and the ever faithful burning car tyres were everywhere. I had visions of the late 80’s and of people being necklaced (burnt alive by being doused with petrol and putting a burning car tyre around their necks).While trying to manoeuvre through all of this, I was accosted by a few stick and brick wielding young men. These boys could not have been older than 17 or 18. And under normal circumstances, they are the kind of boys who would call me “Uncle” and ask to wash my car for a R20 note. Not today. On this day, they controlled the street, and they were intent on taking full advantage. “This car does NOT pass here unless some cool drink money exchanges hands. Otherwise you turn around” The first one said. “If not, we are stoning this car right NOW!” said the other one, definitely a Future Julius among them.I checked my pockets, gave them all the coins I had in my pocket, (no more than R15) and I was granted access into Kwa-Thema.

This had absolutely nothing to do with electricity (an issue which was already resolved) This was just hooliganism, opportunism, and basically a bunch of boys seeing just how much power they had in that brief window. So they chose to exploit the power while they had it. Sound familiar? Power, no matter how little, really does corrupt. Look at how powerful a security guard feels when he knows that he is all that stands between you and entry into a building. How much more when somebody has your life in his hands (cops and criminals alike) or the country's money and future (politicians) in their hands. That kind of power can intoxicate many a man. He would be like a kid in a candy store. Snatch as much money and fill his coffers. Sleep with and marry as many women as he can (if his culture revers a man with many wives) and have as many children as he can (another inexplicable sign of wealth). 

They say with great power comes great responsibility. I would argue that ALL power has to be put in hands that will not abuse it. But you very rarely get to see just how much power might corrupt an individual until he has been given that power.

Friends, this story I am telling with a chuckle right now. But for a brief moment, when Future Julius spoke, it was tense. I knew from all the broken glass on the road that it was not an idle threat. And I also knew that even though turning around may have been given as an option, in reality, it wasn’t. Had I turned around, I would have been seen as resisting and I would have been stoned. As we all know, mob psychology works in mysterious ways. Boys who are normally quite sweet and docile turn into raging lunatics in a crowd. It is easy to be a rebel, when you are among other rebels.

My question to you….how soon before this becomes the norm across the country?

Self Love

Self Love

Friends, before you start getting ideas, this note MAY be entitled Self Love, but it is not about pleasing yourself. Not in the way YOU are thinking…..perverts!

This is an entirely different type of self-love. This is all about making you feel good. About You!

Let me give you a perfect example. Every piece of clothing that you possess, you once loved. You experienced a great feeling of elation when you took your purse out and paid for it.

Why? Because you loved it and felt that it looks great on you. But, as the months go by, sometimes within weeks, even, it is just part of a pile of clothes that you have. So, you need to go back and buy something else to make you feel good. Retail Therapy.

.I don’t know what it is going to take, but I would like to start a movement. Change this for ever. I would like to get to the point where, as you dress, in the morning, you pull out every item of clothing with love. Go back to how you felt when you bought it. Realise that nothing has changed, since you bought it. It is as beautiful now, as it was when you bought it.

I can honestly tell you that this is one of the reasons why I feel so good about myself. This is a big part of why I am always so happy.

If you were to ask me what I am wearing right now, I will say: “I am wearing my black wing tip brogues, with leather on the edges and calf skin in the middle. I am wearing my favourite sheer socks. I am wearing my 100% cotton, single button, single slash, single breasted black suit. I am wearing my white shirt, with the outstitch detail on the collar and on the cuffs. My lambswool sleeveless pullover and my favourite belt. I have accessorized all this with a matching tie, pocket square and cuff link combo.”

This may all sound long winded and boring, but I have done this all for a reason. Every one of the things that I am wearing, I was crazy about when I forked out my hard earned money to buy them. So, I will wear them with pride. I could very easily have said I am wearing a black suit and a white shirt. But that is me belittling the effort that it took to put the package that you see together.

Love Yourself. I WILL be asking you every morning what you are wearing.

Why do women call Mini drivers sluts?

It is no accident that the Mini shares it's name with the mini dress and mini skirt.

They are both sexy, they are both impractical and not everybody can pull one off.

So, as a result, those who cannot pull it off will look at those in them and call them sluts. Those who cannot pull them off will shout from the mountain top "I'd never be caught dead in it." Yeah...you wouldn't. You sure wouldn't, Ms Sour Grapes.

Minis are sexy. And the only people who can pull them off successfully are also sexy. Needless to say, any woman in a Mini or a mini will invariably attract the attention of the opposite sex. And will, in turn, attract the envy of other women.

If I were to take a poll on this one, I am sure I can find a few women who will tell you about at least one Mini driving woman who "stole" their man or a friend's man. But that is like saying "I know a woman in a mini dress who stole my man." The Mini (or mini) is not the problem, here. It is the gorgeous woman inside it. THAT was just made more attractive by the Mini and that is why your man, or your friend's man, could not resist this girl.

Let's face it, although many women complain when they are flooded with attention, I have yet to meet a woman who doesn't secretly enjoy the attention. It is good to be admired. It is great to be seen as attractive. And, truth be told, a Mini will do that. It will give you that attention. Instantly. And the more attractive you are, the more attractive it seems to make you. There is absolutely nothing sexier than a beautiful woman in a Mini, wearing the right pair of shades. You literally see jaws dropping.

I remember once seeing two ladies pull up in a Mini Cooper. And they looked drop dead gorgeous. Until they walked out the car. I was standing at the counter of a fast food outlet. By the time they stood next to me to order, I was thinking; "I can't believe I even saw them as attractive." What changed? They stepped out the car. Ouch!

So...why do many women call Mini driving women sluts? Same reason men call guys who drive Porsche's wankers...we just envy the bastards! And we like to console ourselves and say that if it wasn't for the car, nobody would ever give the bugger a second glance. Except with the guys it is probably true! *evil grin*

Bottom line...when a woman gets more attention than YOU from the other sex, many women will start branding that woman a slut. And THAT, my friends, is the reason why so many women who drive Mini's are called sluts by other women.